Finding out the sex: Reasons to find out & wait

‘To find out or not to find out?’ a question that often haunts parents-to-be! This is one of the biggest choices parents to be will make during pregnancy. And while it’s a personal decision that only you and your partner can make, here are the both sides of the argument to help you make the best decision for both of you.

Reasons to find out

  • Organisation
    You’ll only have to agree on one name, buy sex-specific clothes rather than gender neutral and decorate the nursery for either a little boy or a little girl.
  • Economical
    If your sibling or friend recently had a baby you could be the recipient of some perfect hand-me-downs instead of purchasing EVERYTHING new. Or alternatively if it’s a time of year where there are good sales, you can purchase bigger clothes for your little one and store away.
  • Emotional
    You just want your baby to be born healthy. But there is also a chance you may have your heart set on having a little boy or girl as soon as you found out you were pregnant. By finding out before he or she is born, you’ll be able to deal with the emotions you might experience if it isn’t what you had hoped for and by the time they are born all that is left will be excitement and happiness!
  • Reassurance
    Knowing the sex might help make your pregnancy and baby feel more real (if it hasn’t sunk in yet). Talking specifically to your little boy or girl may even help with bonding.

Reasons to wait

  • Surprise
    If you already know what you are having you can lose the chance to create a very precious memory in the moments after birth when you meet your baby for the first time and finally find out whether he or she is a little boy or little girl. You might risk missing out on one of the greatest surprises you can get in life!
  • Motivation
    Not knowing what you are having might be an extra incentive to help you through the toughest stages of labour by focusing on the surprise after birth. The last few weeks of pregnancy may be more bearable not knowing too. Excitement is a great from of motivation.
  • Tradition
    It’s the way people have been doing it for centuries.
  • They might be wrong!
    As great as modern medicine is, it can be wrong at times. There’s always the chance that the sonographer might make a mistake; it’s happened before and will no doubt happen again. There may be a financial and emotional price to pay if you’ve spent the last few months preparing to meet your daughter but now have a son instead.

What if you and your partner can’t agree on whether to find out or not? One solution is for one partner to learn the sex and not tell the other. Or find out together and keep it a secret from the rest of the world. Either way, you’ll find out the sex of your child sooner or later, so try not to stress about it too much and enjoy your pregnancy.

Here are some questions to ask yourself before you decide:

  • Do your thoughts of labour usually end with your doctor’s voice calling out “it’s a boy” or “it’s a girl” after months of anticipation?
  • Are you excited about choosing two sets of names (one for a boy, one for a girl)? Or would you rather not select names that won’t get used?
  • In your head, is your nursery filled with girlish pinks or boyish blues — or are you happy with a neutral colour scheme?
  • Are you having fun waiting and speculating the gender?

Some parents can’t wait to learn the sex of their baby, while others are content to wait until their baby makes its grand entrance. It’s important to remember that there is no right or wrong decision. It’s completely up to you and your partner.

Happy deciding!